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FOOTBALL RPF FIC: Castaway

Title: Castaway
Rating: PG-13 for language
Pairing: Iker Casillas/Xavi Hernandez
Word Count: ~1400
Summary: The Spain NT's injured captains are marooned in Madrid for the friendly against Uruguay. At least they have each other.
Disclaimer: While inspired by real persons and events, this is a work of fiction. Gentle mockery and rampant speculation ahoy.



When Iker responded to the sharp knock by opening his door, Xavi nipped in under his arm, lugging a duffle bag behind him, and toed off his shoes in the entryway before setting off at a trot. "Come on! The match is about to start!"

"Nice to see you again too, Pelopo," Iker said loudly, shutting the door and padding after him. "Sorry I showed up so late that we were forced to rush... oh wait."

Xavi was already sprawled on the sofa when Iker reached the den, a beer in one hand, his damp hair sticking out in all directions and his eyes glued to the screen. "My flight was late. Damn, why isn't Del Bosque starting Villa? The man is going to develop a complex."

Iker sank down next to him and slid an arm around his shoulders; Xavi craned his neck to give him a quick peck on the cheek but then turned back to the television, muttering to himself. His open beer bottle, forgotten, sweated in his hand; Iker slipped it out of his fingers and set it on a coaster on the coffee table without Xavi even noticing.

Fifteen minutes in, their false nine kicked a fierce field goal, and Xavi whooped and leaped up off the sofa, then fell back, wincing. "¡Joder! I keep forgetting."

Iker draped his right hand over Xavi's inner thigh and squeezed very gently. "And here I thought that you were just faking a hamstring tear so you could come pay the invalid a visit."

"It's no big deal," Xavi said shortly, although he relaxed almost imperceptibly into Iker's touch and spread his legs a little. "Two weeks, tops."

Iker raised his eyebrows. "Milan?"

Xavi huffed out a breath and rubbed the back of his neck. "We'll see." He was trying to act nonchalant, but Iker could tell how much the admission cost him.

"Why the hell didn't Roura sub you out earlier?" Iker demanded. "You were already exhausted after the clásico. With Tito gone, it looks like the lunatics are running the asylum."

Xavi narrowed his eyes, the match momentarily forgotten. "Better that," he said, "than having it run by the biggest lunatic of them all."

The corner of Iker's mouth twitched upwards. "No comment."

"Did you and Ramos really issue Perez an ultimatum?" Xavi asked, lowering his voice conspiratorially. It sent an answering shiver down Iker's spine; he struggled to keep his mind on the matter at hand.

"Of course not."

"Nothing so crass, eh?" Xavi tapped the side of his nose. "He's not a stupid man. I'm sure that you didn't have to spell everything out for him." When Iker said nothing, he prodded, "I bet that Mourinho will be in England by summer."

"No bet," Iker said quickly.

"Oh ho! So you do know something," Xavi gloated. He bumped Iker insistently with his shoulder. "Spill."

"I know that the press has been reporting recent contact with Chelsea," Iker said with a shrug.

Xavi waved this away. "I read about that. But why would he want to get himself bogged down in that mess? No, no. I think Chelsea is just a red herring. Man City, maybe."

"That should prove interesting," Iker said, "when Guardiola takes over at United."

"If Mourinho lasts that long," Xavi replied darkly. "A three year contract, which of us would have expected that?" He folded his arms and turned his attention back to the television, then swore suddenly and slapped the sofa cushion. "Pedrito! Stop looking around for another striker and fucking shoot!" He rubbed irritably at his eyes. "That boy had better find his form and fast."

"Sure," Iker agreed. "Right after the return leg of the Copa."

A moment later, they both groaned as another attempt by Cesc was blocked. "You know what would be perfect," Xavi offered, "is if Puyi could score a goal for his 100th cap." Iker nodded and started stroking the other man's thigh, watching for a reaction. He did not get the one he had wanted. "Eh, cabrón, quit distracting me."

"Hmmm?" Iker murmured innocently, leaning over to nuzzle Xavi's neck.

His friend's eyelids fluttered shut helplessly, then snapped open again. "¡Joder! Can't you wait until halftime at least?" Iker started to pull away, indignant, before Xavi clasped the back of his neck, laughing, and kissed him firmly and sweetly. "I'm kidding! You know I'm kidding, right?" He reached down to take Iker's left hand lightly in his own, traced an invisible line from the tip of his finger across his calloused palm to his wrist. "I didn't even get to see the cast," he said, mostly to himself.

"That tickles," Iker complained, pulling his hand away. "Anyway, I'm going to be fine. I just need to take it easy for a while."

"Don't worry," Xavi said, patting his knee, "we won't do anything to risk straining it."

"That better not be a promise," Iker retorted, and Xavi laughed again.

"At least it's your left hand, tio, no danger of depriving yourself."

"I'm being deprived right now," Iker growled, just as the commentator's long, drawn-out "Goooooooooooooooool!" rang out and Xavi jerked as if he'd been slapped.

"Puta madre. Who was that?" They both sat forward, waited breathlessly for the replay. "Cristian Rodriguez? Damn. You totally could have saved that."

"Hey," Iker chided him. "Whatever happened to club loyalty?"

"Ask Victor," Xavi said, and Iker could see genuine hurt and confusion flare in his eyes.

He nudged the smaller man with his shoulder. "What's the story with Victor, anyway? I don't believe that bullshit about new clubs and cultures for a minute."

"He confided in me," Xavi confirmed, "but I swore eternal silence."

"Okay," Iker said, and slouched back as if he really didn't give a damn why Barcelona's keeper and co-captain might be leaving. He fought the urge to glance back at Xavi and counted without moving his lips.

Sure enough, it took less than ten seconds for Xavi to sidle closer and say, "It's all your fault, you know."

"What?" Iker sat up. "It's not like I'm keeping him from getting playing time at Barcelona."

Xavi rolled his eyes. "Obviously, but think about it: you're San Iker, hero of club and country, a favorite for this year's Balón de Oro for Christ's sake. Victor has been in your shadow all of his life. He doesn't understand how thankless a job goalkeeping is supposed to be for mere mortals."

"Have you considered," Iker said, "that maybe this decision had less to do with me and more with the fact that you, Puyi, and Leo all seemed like much higher priorities for renewal?"

"I'm sure that didn't help," Xavi acknowledged. "Whatever, he feels like the fans don't appreciate him, and he wants to start fresh somewhere else."

"And you failed to talk him out of it."

"Me? I was an understanding ear, a shoulder to cry on..." In response to Iker's knowing look, Xavi surrendered with a shrug. "Yeah, tried every argument in the book, but he wouldn't budge."

"Do you think he'll be sold this summer?" Iker asked.

"The club would be stupid not to," Xavi answered, which, as they both knew, was no answer at all. "Actually, we should have tried to get someone in the January transfer window. What does Real need with four fucking goalkeepers?" he demanded abruptly, his tone as accusing as if Iker had signed Diego Lopez himself.

Iker only shrugged uncomfortably; he felt bad for the canteranos, even after Adán's less than diplomatic remarks when he'd been used to put Iker on the bench.

"By the way, I've been meaning to ask you: did Xabi really pull his groin? I guess that's what he gets for being such an enormous dick during the clásico," Xavi gibed.

"Very funny. We've had terrible luck with injuries," Iker pointed out. "Not that it's an excuse, but we basically haven't had a full squad this whole season."

"And as club suffers, so does country. Today the Selección is deprived of both our services," Xavi said dramatically. "The valiant captain, his broken hand confined to a cast; his lame but loyal first mate, willing to be fitted for a peg leg if it means he can set sail at his side once again..."

"Luckily your mouth still seems to be working," Iker muttered.

Just then the halftime whistle blew and Xavi turned back to him, breaking into a leer. "You're about to find out just how lucky," he said, and Iker sucked in a breath as his friend reached for his fly.



Comments

( 18 comments — Leave a comment )
elizaberglund
Feb. 8th, 2013 06:58 am (UTC)
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww this is amasing!!!!!! I cracked at Xavi just coming and and planting himself on Ikers sofa. It shows how familiar they are with each other and he feels at home at Iker's place.

And tehir discusion about Mou ... Iker not denying anything yet still being loyal to the club. This is totally believeable and in character!

But I admit, they should have rested Xavi. He looked exhausted last 2-3 games ... poor baby! At least Iker can now make it better!

Aw ... Victor ... I still hope he changes his mind tbh

And I was a bit mad at Adan for his comments but I guess they were simply what he was told to say ... and how heartbroken he looked when he did not get to start in the last game! He clearly thought he finally got a shot and than he is now a subsitute to a new substitue of Iker ... he should leave in summer really.

Lol at Xavi's working mouth!
flywoman
Feb. 8th, 2013 12:17 pm (UTC)
Hee! It took me a little while to figure out how to begin the fic, but I love the way that Xavi demonstrates how comfortable he is with Iker (and how obsessed he is with football).

Xavi had been looking slower and less accurate for the last couple of matches, and now this :(. Trying to look on the bright side - at least he'll be forced to rest. I hope he's back for the CL match. It seems like Roura is more reluctant than Tito to rotate the squad, and they really need it, especially at this time of year.

Mou... (shaking my head) So much drama at RM. It became so obvious when they hired Diego Lopez that he didn't actually trust Adan, he just wanted to put Iker on the bench for some reason. (Well, he got his wish after Arbeloa's kick.)

Hahahaha, I knew that I wanted to end the fic with that line about Xavi's mouth before I even started writing it.

Thanks so much for your comments, I'm really glad that you enjoyed this!
sageharper
Feb. 8th, 2013 06:10 pm (UTC)
In my head it all happened exactly like that, and nobody can convince me otherwise.

See this is why Xavi needs to be the coach one day.

Aww Iker is so precious.

Hopefully the rest will do him good, but I'm still sad about it. Might actually cry if he misses the Milan match.

Yeah Xavi, you just tell it like it is. Only saying what we're all thinking. He still manages to be quite sweet though.

Xavi, eternal silence, bwhahahaha (even though that's just a narrative device because you don't know, I respect that)

I genuinley did wonder at the time why Real didn't just get someone on loan, he's going to have a long time warming their bench to look forward too.

Gah you can't stop it there! lol

So yes I loved it all. The banter, references to pretty much everything going on right now, and that it was quite hot. Didn't have to be said that they've been so close for so long.

As random aside; where can I get a decent icon of Iker?
Am not quite up for blindly trawling though loads of madridista wank for it.
elizaberglund
Feb. 8th, 2013 06:57 pm (UTC)
yes, nice Iker icon is something I long for myself tbh
flywoman
Feb. 8th, 2013 08:01 pm (UTC)
Thank you! This is totally head canon for me now \o/

Xavi so needs to be the coach one day, even if he hasn't quite realized it yet.

He will do whatever he can to be back on the pitch for Milan, I'm sure of it.

Xavi is a great character for telling it like it is (or like I think it is anyway). But fundamentally a sweetie too <3.

And also a huge gossip, lol. The only thing he didn't do in this fic was criticize Iker's fashion sense (which he should. Early and often.)

I know right? Lopez is a good keeper, too. He'd better enjoy those precious few weeks.

Ahahaha, sorry, that was exactly where I wanted it to end.

Thanks so much for your comments - even if only four people in the world enjoyed this fic, I'm glad that I wrote it. This was quite a change from my usual angsty star-crossed scenario for them, and I have to admit that it was a ton of fun to write them sort of fluffy and domestic. You and jezziejay must have rubbed off on me ;).

I don't have a good Iker icon either, but if someone points me towards a photo, I can make one.

Edited at 2013-02-08 08:01 pm (UTC)
sageharper
Feb. 8th, 2013 09:19 pm (UTC)
Pretty sure all your fics end up being my head canon.

It's painfully obvious to everyone but him, would so awesome if he and Puyi ended up coaching together.

Of course, he does love his football and wouldn't let them down.

That is total canon for sure, hence all the bookings for dissent. There was a photoshoot/interview with him & Iker and he did say then 'yeah Iker's a pain in the arse, but I say that with love'.

lol totally. Maybe it's to encourage him to get naked sooner, but yeah Iker's dress sense is just pitiful.

He must know that, apparently it was why he left Real in the first place.

Nah I'm kidding, can manage my own epilogue just fine. ;)

That's good then. I can't write angst, try to but no, it's embarassing really. They are just fun to play with in all capacities.
lol I quite like being a bad influence then.

Ah ok, never mind.
flywoman
Feb. 8th, 2013 09:51 pm (UTC)
Aw, thanks, but can we really have head canon that they are simultaneously broken up since the WC and happily domestic together? Makes my brain hurt ;).

Re: Iker, I had heard the story about Xavi's friends putting a bunch of stuff in his suitcase so that he was called out by security at the airport, but I had no idea that roomie Iker was the culprit (after taking him out and getting him drunk no less, well maybe I exaggerate, but they did go out drinking, and it would help explain why Xavi didn't notice in the "rush" the next morning). I would love to know exactly why Xavi thinks he's a pain in the ass sometimes.

Hee, was pretty sure that my readers would be able to come up with a satisfying epilogue on their own.
sageharper
Feb. 8th, 2013 11:26 pm (UTC)
Yeah I'm not exactly consistent with it, just whatever suits my current agenda.

I heard that one too, teenage boys are so silly. Hmm yes I wonder too, someone should ask him.

lol naturally.
flywoman
Feb. 9th, 2013 09:51 pm (UTC)
BTW, have you seen this post?
sageharper
Feb. 10th, 2013 12:29 am (UTC)
Have now, some good choices there. :)

Yeah do agree about Leo, pretty much. I used to have a thing for him, and in certain light it comes back to me [the sweet eyes, dimpled chin, etc]. It's just that between his height and inability to dress himself (is that some contractual requirement?) he often ends up looking like the kid at a party who doesn't know what to do with their hands [which is me too, not judging]. That or he looks sort of gerbil-like (hamsters have rounder faces).

Anyway I saw the equire photoshoot he did recently (and pics from his renewal) and laughed, a lot.

It seems a bit ironic having Iker as a dirty secret crush; he's too nice for that. I mean it's not like VV or Puyi who would just ravish you; at the very least you'd have to say please first.
Seriously he's just objectivley handsome; and so adorable/wholesome charning. Has that whole boy next door could take home to meet your grandma thing going on. Which that's great too.
flywoman
Feb. 10th, 2013 12:46 am (UTC)
OMG, the photos of Leo signing his renewal - I was cringing and LMAO simultaneously! Really, between that and his 4th Balon d'Or suit, doesn't he have anyone close to him who can advise him on matters of fashion or at least taste? And I hadn't seen the Esquire photos, but now that I have... while I would say he has the cutest ankles & feet of anyone on the team, why the heck would I want to see them while he's wearing a suit?? And yeah, you're right, more gerbil than hamster. (I can't complain about his height though - he's roughly Xavi-size, which for me is perfect.)

Oh, Iker is awfully handsome and wholesome and charming, ITA. I was just referring to the fact that he was (is) captain of RM so I felt bad about crushing on him. (I'm over that now.)
sageharper
Feb. 10th, 2013 02:57 pm (UTC)
lol that was me too. So hmm yeah don't think so then. You'd think someone would stage an intervention.

I don't have any objection to his height either (have never gone for tall guys, maybe because my brother is); but surely in a photoshoot you would have tricks to make him appear taller. The rolled up trousers reminded me of the hobbits which doesn't help either.

Oh I know, it's good in clasicos and Spain games when you have a legit excuse to admire him; but overall I'm at peace with my choices. At least Unai is a cule, I can work with that.
flywoman
Feb. 10th, 2013 08:50 pm (UTC)
Ahahaha, you're so right about the rolled-up trouser legs and hobbits.

Is there a Barcelona fic out there with Pep as Gandalf and the Barcelona boys as hobbits (or dwarves)? There totally should be.
sageharper
Feb. 10th, 2013 10:06 pm (UTC)
Hmm not sure, haven't seen one. I agree there should be, they cast themselves. :)
jezziejay
Feb. 9th, 2013 01:06 am (UTC)
DOMESTIC FLUFF! *claps hands wildly*

So, a lot of the references went over my head - BUT.

The way Xavi just flew in the door and made himself at home and then Iker putting an arm around him...I was hooked. There was a lot of comfort in there, and the banter was so easy and (dare I say it??) sweet. I was smiling all the way...

And then your last line KILLED me - as they often do.

So, as you know, this is my favourite type of fic, bar none. Silly, cute, funny boys being in their own version of love.

He reached down to take Iker's left hand lightly in his own, traced an invisible line from the tip of his finger across his calloused palm to his wrist. "I didn't even get to see the cast," he said, mostly to himself. ♥ ♥ ♥

"That should prove interesting," Iker said, "when Guardiola takes over at United." What now? Is this true??

flywoman
Feb. 9th, 2013 04:52 am (UTC)
Hahahaha, I totally thought of you while writing this! I'm really glad that you enjoyed it :D.

It's okay, you can say it. This was pretty sweet. I mean, considering. Just a comfortable reunion of old, old friends who love football and each other. I could actually get used to this - it was really fun to write.

I live for a punny title and a good last line ;).

You do know that Iker's own defender kicked him by accident and broke his wrist, right? He's out for two months, and the club hired another keeper who had been trained in their youth squads.

Guardiola has a three year contract with Bayern Munich, but a lot of people have speculated that he'll be offered the job when Ferguson finally retires.

elisa88
Feb. 10th, 2013 03:41 am (UTC)
Aww, that was adorable! And so so funny XD
Loved it ♥
flywoman
Feb. 10th, 2013 12:00 pm (UTC)
Thanks so much for letting me know! <3

This was really fun to write.
( 18 comments — Leave a comment )

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